Circles

Somehow things always seem to come full circle.  At times, it's a good thing.  At times it's not.  I love the town where I have lived for most of my life.  When I moved away a year and a half ago, it was no secret that I wanted to return.  Whether that meant returning to The 409, or pursuing some other avenue - I just wanted to come home.  To be near my friends, family, church... my roots, if you will.

As my last post said, you'd best be careful what you wish for, because you just might get it.

For my (few) friends who come here from Facebook, thank you for not posting anything publicly over there in response to this. If you come here regularly, then you are probably one of the ones who has been so happy for me. I want you to know about this.  I'd prefer not to have any comments posted on Facebook, to avoid my life being the accident on the freeway where casual observers strain their necks just to get a glimpse of the gore and blood.  98% of my FB friends never click on the link to bring them here, and for this particular blog post, that's just fine.  Thank you for understanding.

I have indeed returned home, to The 409.  I suppose I should have been more specific with the details of my wish.  I did not wish to return alone.  Yet, here I sit in my spruced-up house.... alone.

So, now you know.  I love small-town living, but one of the drawbacks is that personal matters don't stay personal for very long.  Whether it's good news or bad news.  There are many people who have shared in my happiness - and will be sad to learn what has happened. This truth reminds me to be grateful for the many friends who have wished me well and celebrated with me, and who will offer prayers on behalf of all who are hurting because of this.

But for now, the world seems to have stopped turning, and the grief at times is unbearable.  There are moments that I know I will survive, and then there are moments that I seem to forget to breathe.

The important thing for me to do right now is to make it through the next minute, the next hour, then the next day.  There are many cliches we tell our friends who are hurting - and I've already quoted them all to myself.

I do know that there will be brighter days ahead.  My dear friend Lynn sent this verse of comfort from the Psalms:  The Lord is close to the brokenhearted, and saves those who are crushed in spirit. Ps 34:18.  I know this to be true from enduring painful times in the past, and it will be no less true for me now.  There are many words of comfort from the Scriptures, from inspirational quotes, etc.  The shoulders of my girlfriends are wet with my tears, and their hugs warm my heart.  Even in despair, I am truly blessed.

Soon I will be bringing a fluffy new kitten to live with me at The 409.  Between the love of my friends and family, my precious grandbabies, a new kitten, and with God giving me strength... there will surely be a day when smiling will once again come easily.


CathyB